Thursday, March 12, 2009

God's hand

When i was walking down the adoption path, and started to be really open about it, everywhere I turned, someone was connected to adoption. My Father's nurse when he was dying walked in on me sobbing one day and I confessed my heart about everything included this journey we were on trying to adopt - and she said: "that's awesome, I'm adopted!" My good friend from NYC gently reminded me that she too was adopted. One of my Dr.'s said to me: "Adoption....that is how I came to my family!" God continually put people in my life that affirmed our decision, and supported us along the way. It is always better to feel you are walking along side people, instead of alone.

Now that we are full force into IVF (just gave myself a shot) everywhere I go, people start to talk to me about fertility. Most of the women I have encountered lately, that I hadn't known before are doing it, have done it, or have children from it. And each time I ask the same questions, (transfer one or two? do the shots in the rear hurt? does Lupron make you crazy?!) I am relegated with stories, given affirmation, and offers of support. Here's God's hand once again.

Why do I have such a hard time seeing what it right in front of me? That my faith and my God truly walk beside me? I was in my MOPS meeting (christian woman's group) and we were talking about how we all feel that we fall short when it comes to our faith. That we have - well speaking for myself, that I have such a hard time to keep God in the center of my life. He is gently nudging me all the time...as I walk or stumble along this path God keeps putting people in my life to support me. I suppose it's the closet thing he can offer.

I am thankful, and I do find peace and solace in hearing other peoples stories of struggle or success. There is truly something about not walking alone.

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